Good Luck

I was born in the desert. And maybe that’s why I was apportioned a part of the temperament of the desert. Harsh and unforgiving I seemed. Except here and there you would chance upon something which hinted at the idea that if you persevered long and hard enough, it would be worth your while. Again I make no promises.

I wasn’t always this way. Alright that’s a lie. I was and I tried to conform for a while but it was a wasted effort. So I stopped lying to myself and found a cd of Chris Rea and listened to Daytona instead.

The reason I stopped trying was as clear as the sky outside. That is to say not very clear. It was raining like mad outside and the sky was overcast. Exactly what I wanted my mood to reflect. But even that seemed to be doing the let’s be uncooperative routine and it did noting to improve my already chipper disposition. Sunshine and cheer. Bah! Was my personality changing somehow? Did I seem happier? I didn’t want to change. I liked myself fine exactly the way I was. This thought like most others didn’t hold my attention for very long and so I decided to think instead of a new and hopefully interesting personality that had happened to waltz into my life.

The charming if not handsome Watsisfaceagain. Watsi for short. Watsi was like a breath of fresh air after all the others. Because I was clean out of ways for lowering their too high expectations. It was getting to be less amusing and more tedious by the minute. Watsi however was different. He had no expectations. So I wondered, if he had no expectations, what the hell did he want? There was no winning with me. I honestly couldn’t figure what it was that he wanted. Did he want a new buddy? A pal? Unlikely. Although those were high on the list of wanted commodities these days. Well I wasn’t in the market for a pal on order. Hell no. I wasn’t in the market for anything. Should I go off and live on deserted island then? I asked myself. Nah, too extreme. Too much of a bother. So I decided that since I certainly didn’t know what I wanted, Watsi could do whatever the hell he wanted to and it would be fine by me.

There were some other things on my mind, like for example the fact that I was going to have to start caring about a certain someone. Not because I really cared. No sir. But because my innate good nature insisted that I did. It was like having a loosing argument with your self. Which only confused matters further, because if you had an argument with yourself and you lost, it meant that the other party [who just also happened to be you] won. How disagreeable this was all getting to be.

I remember someone as I try to recollect all the unsolved things that have thus far been swept under the beanbag which has been shoved under my bed.
I’m rather convinced that this one was dropped on his head as a baby. That’s the only way to explain the mad glint I sometimes caught in his eye. The glint to match that maniacal smile that accompanied it, which disappeared as soon as he noticed that I was looking. Well this one was none of my concern anymore so I chose not to waste any more energy units on him

Now here’s someone worth wasting energy units on. I watched you grow more and more disillusioned. Always convinced. And I wonder if I ever envied you your conviction.
There was that and also the fact that you seemed less and less inclined to see my point of view these days. This saddened me. Ok it didn’t really. But for both our sakes we’ll just pretend that it did.

The last solution deprived situation involved a princess, yes a princess. One who had climbed up on to a pedestal and was now sitting on it swinging her legs and looking bored. The only thing I can think to do in a situation like this is to push her off the pedestal when she’s not looking. Mad glint was probably waiting down ready to catch her. That would certainly have solved everyone’s problems

A conclusion, the story was screaming for an end. So I ended it. Twisted.